Monday, November 28, 2011

Bitter Sweet


Nothing like travelling half way around the globe, for a bit of perspective on things.

London, was London. I always do rather normal things like have lunch with girlfriends at the Peter Jones Brasserie and shopping at Jane Asher - these things make me happy. South Africa was wonderful - dare I say it booming in comparison to the rest of the rather dreary recession-bound world and then I get back to here - which is, well, here.

So first things first: It took me nearly 2 weeks to miss the children. This will not elevate me to the Motherhood Hall of Fame but in my defence, it took the boys about the same amount of time to miss me. I know as good mothers we are meant to miss the children somewhere between dropping them off in the morning and picking them up in the afternoon, but I usually dont - I'm quite relieved to get into the office in the morning and sit down for a few hours.

It just so happenend that we all started missing each other on the one day which also coincided with the day T got back home with the kids and Skype at 7:15pm in the evening - which was 1:15am for me in South Africa. By this stage I'd drunk more than my fair share of wine, had listened to loud dance music (on headphones) to stay awake and had amused myself making sarky comments on Facebook until I even got bored with that. And then suddenly one is confronted by a picture of 3 little squirmy, tired, hungry children about 8000 miles away and really these are not Cadbury Magic Moments. And then their father and I actually managed to have a Trans Atlantic squabble - on Skype - then followed by IM - which is really evil for arguments as one can be very rude very quickly without having to run away ( @#$% you. %$#@ you too. I'm going to bed. Well %$#@ off then. You too. etc).

Anyhow - familys do survive these things - amazingly.

Seeing one's friends rips at my soul. I also don't get round to seeing all the people I would like to, as  work commitments are pretty demanding too. Six of my close girlfriends this year (Kath, Susie, Ailsa, Jo-jo, Sal & Amy) have all lost their fathers during the past year. All of them are strong which makes me love them even more. There is no gettting around it though - long distance relationships suck. One chooses ones friends because you like them and they make you laugh and feel good, and this fact is always, unsurprisingly, hammered home when you are together. I usually cry from about Cape Town to Beaufort West, Joburg to Pietersburg and London to Isle of White as I lament all of this. Then I have a stiff drink and watch a movie.


Anyhow I got back to a new government on the island (the one we voted for) and some more bearable temperatures, it being winter. No children had been expelled from school, the cleaner was still on the payroll and T and I kissed and made-up.  We went sailing with our wonderful neighbours on Sunday, and we really sailed (ie with sails!) which was bliss.

It was William's 6th birthday on Wednesday. T went over to the US to buy him a bicycle and he got a Playmobil Pirate Ship, a remote control car and a snorkelling kit (lest you think our children miss out on anything stuck on an island). The "boogie on a board" party (Williams idea - surfing & disco music - quelle horreur) is on Saturday.

Not so fab was no water in the cistern and no phone or internet, as the new, over-enthusiastic gardener had swiped through the telephone wires with his machette. Another day in paradise, you mutter to yourself.

Anyhow back to there being absolutely no time to feel sorry for oneself, let alone philosophical. We're trying to pull some Christmas things together but it's not proving easy.

Last night all the stars did align however. John Legend gave a concert on the island - which was just sexy and fun and slick and professional and just brillianty grown-up and normal. I could tuck some of my sadness away and be grateful for my life on this little green dot Pluto - this place we call home.