Monday

I was going to do a little perky Monday post, mainly because I didn't have to report that the children had gone sailing , yet again, over the weekend, but it's not going to happen. I now wish to relocate to Switzerland, and if they wont let me in - Antarctica.

It's the middle of May, but it's already hot. And buggy. And everything seems to fall apart when it's hot and buggy, or maybe that's just me.

Having dispatched the children to bed, I was looking forward to spending a leisurely hour or so writing up this blog. I was going to post some chirpy Jamaican music (Movado Delilah) which we are all listening too on our little car radios as we grind up and down the volcano with potholes (otherwise known as Tortola) and a couple of photos of our lovely weekend (which for once, as we know, didn't include sailing). I was also going to write some upbeat dingetjies about motherhood.

To treat myself, I thought I would switch on the brand new air conditioner in our new home and pour myself a little glass of cold, dry white. This would mean that it would be beautifully cool, there would be no mozzies and I could receive my husband, who is working tonight, in serene surroundings when he got home from a cheffing gig. I was looking forward to YouTubing (there you go Joburg Book Club, another verb!) some new music that I like, since the radio stations here never seem to announce the songs, and I never know who the hell I'm listening to.

Well.

None of this happened.

For starters - I couldn't find how to switch on the friggin music on the computer, which Tyler has now expertly wired up through the new sound system. Audio On. Audio Off. On Off On Off. Fiddle fiddle. I thought of phoning him, but that's never a good idea in mid-service (but has been known to happen before). I switched to the new laptop (which I'm forbidden to use) but it had the same bloody set-up. No amount of things on/off or in/out seemed to work.

Now irritated, I had to pour myself another glass of dry white, remembering that this was meant to be accompanied by the icy-cold air conditioner which is brand, brand new. This should have been a warning (ie a bit like the brand new dishwasher, which had also been "installed" ie pushed into its space in the kitchen). After a lot of on/off and in/outs with the AC, all that happened was the knob-thingy came away in my hand. Just like that. Broken. As in "she is not wacking".

Since I was now being eaten alive, I frantically tried to hunt down the can of "Off" which had completely vanished. Gone. Nowhere to be found. The last known mortals to use it were the children. That was the nice piece on motherhood gone. Sometimes I really don't like my children, especially when been chomped by man-eating mosquito's.

By which stage I was furious. Being a complete sucker for punishment, I decided that I definitely needed some music to cheer me up. And another glass of icy, dry white since it was the only thing that was cold.

So I decided to use James' little laptop, hoping like hell that this hadn't also been inveigled into our new wireless entertainment system I wasn't aware we had and certainly dont know how to work. (as in all I want to do is Switch The Music On).  This was my biggest mistake. I Googled 'New Music 2012' or something stupid like that and clicked on MTV's Top 40 Hits.

Please, don't do this at home. It's very bad for both your soul and sanity. Oh my goodness me. To see Snoop Dog (at least 50 years old and father of twenty-somethings) singing with Kanye West "We're Young and Wild and Free", oh puuuhleasse. No you're not: You're old and rich and probably a grandfather. Not one but two songs by the ghastly Katy Perry who sounds just like Jesse J, who looks just like Lady Gaga who sounds and looks just like Nicki Minaj. And actually also Madonna (who all the afore-mentioned look like anyway) who we definitely know is over 50 but at least wasn't signing "I'm Young & Wild & Free" but some silly duo with Nicki Minaj and someone else, probably Drake.  Last week on Isle 95's Hot Caribbean Charts, the number one hit was Rihanna ft Drake and number two was a song by Drake ft Rihanna. S'trues Bob. I don't feel old or anything watching all this rubbish, just superior.

Anyway needless to say I couldn't find the cable to download the pics from the weekend (the old computer dosn't have a chip/memory disk thingy) and it's now almost 12:30pm and I need to be up again at 4:45am to have my daily bout of internet-wrangling. In trying to load an arbitrary image to go with the blog, everything hung, nothing uploaded and I almost lost the entire thing. I swear I would have given up blogging on the spot, had this been the case.

I suppose the outcome of this rather depressing Monday evening is (a) I'm now pleased that we do live on a remote island (b) I'm even more pleased that I'm not a 50 year old + popstar and (c) I should always write my blog on a Sunday.

Monday is a disaster.

Keep Awake and Sail On

We've had a whole weekend of sailing with James (Blue Fleet) and Georgie (Green Fleet) racing in the BVI Dinghy Championships, also known as The Main Reason Why We Could Never Afford to Retire.

On Saturday Night we had a Cinco de Mayo party at the Yacht Club, which was just a good excuse to eat lots of Mexican food (cooked by Tyler) and great fun. In fact the whole weekend was very enjoyable despite the weather, which required parents having to spend quite a bit of time watching becalmed dinghies in the pouring rain. However, everyone pitched in and the kids had a blast with their little sailor friends from all around the Caribbean.

Emeralds & Mountain Bikes

It's a Boys World. On Friday night after some night fishing on the Beef Island Bridge with 12 little boys and their fathers, we had 9 boys back here for a braai supposedly to eat the fish, but luckily we had lots of ribs (just in case) and a sleepover. I think Tyler and I got to bed about 2:30am and the boys got even less sleep, so by Saturday evening, after a day of morning yoga and Saturday afternoon race training for the boys ( and a spoily hair session for me) we were all scuppered.

Sunday was my birthday and I had a wonderfully relaxed and (I do not like this over-used term but in this instance it fits) blessed day. I was spoilt with Eggs Benedict in bed, phone calls from South Africa and all my wonderful pressies: very pretty earrings from T, some age-defying cream from my Mother, a beautiful print from Kathryn, exquisite linen from Beth and wait for it....drumroll......a mountain bike! Which just about sums me up I suppose: a middle-aged gal learning how to mountain bike in good jewellery!

I spent most of the day reading my book from James called Lots of Candles, Plenty of Cake by Anna Quinlen - which is all about getting older, something I now have to start staring down. I was first alerted to Anna's writing many years ago when she gave a commencement speech which was widely circulated amongst the management consultant circles in which I swam and it had a profound impact on me. In it she exhorted the students to 'get a life and not a resume'. She's a great analytical voice and writes very forcefully on contemporary society, and I urge you to read her. It was a wonderful way to spend most of one's birthday and some things made me laugh out loud,  like when her very emotional daughter calls her after a tornado had struck their home and she says "oh honey, I'm too old to die young now!"


Anyhow after all that philosophy it was necessary to literally and figuratively get on my bike, and off we all went - Tyler running after William who still has his trainer wheels on and the two older ones showing-off like mad, and we rode to the tidal pool for a swim and then pushed our bikes back up the hill, home. In the evening Tyler took me to the new Brandywine, and I ate lobster salad & the duck special and drank Verve - asking myself if life could get any better.

Birthdays, 4am starts and corkscrews

Georgie

This week saw us hurtling between new frontiers on the hedge fund side, James' 11th birthday, the annual Talent Show and Family Food's biggest event to date at the Old Government House on Tuesday evening. We would never stand accused of not living a varied life.

So first things first: Tuesday went off well, with only a few minor hiccups like no CORKSCREWS to open any of the wine. Luckily we had a friend 'next door' who was phoned in a panic and could deliver the readies about a minute before 65 thirsty barristers descended on us. The canapes seemed to go down well and there were no further hiccups after the prospect of no alcohol.

On Thursday our eldest boy turned a mind-blowing eleven years old. His main present was  a Gill life jacket (you can see him wearing it in this picture left) which is used for racing. The boys have all the main regattas coming up in the next month or so, so a certain sailor was tickled pink. That evening we all went out for an enjoyable dinner at our local West Indian restaurant here in Carrot Bay.

Palms Delight

Tyler went off to St Thomas on Friday to buy equipment for the bakery, which we are starting to get into countdown mode now for and the evening saw us trooping off to 'Cedars Got Talent' which I was slightly dreading after such a......varied week. Anyway it was a total blast.  We had Alicia Keys (well not really) Abba (The Marvels & their  Mediocre Mums) Santana (the Spanish & Music teacher duo) and some brilliant dancing - with a Gr 2 Madonna-in-the-making, stealing the show.  It's always a bit of relief that, in the spirit of reciprocity, other parents are so scrupulously non-judgemental of one's own progeny, so everything was greeted with rapturous applause. The boys played their piano exam pieces and didn't embarrass their music teacher too much.

You can understand why Saturday was spent doing as little as possible although we do have to make some attempt at Taming the House. Saturday evening we had a braai and then fell asleep in front of Mission Impossible 3. Today we went to Cooper Island with friends for lunch, making Tuesday feel like about last year.

Family Life

The week was productive, in part, and we are a few steps closer to the bakery opening, although it's definitely not going to be the beginning of May, more like the end. We amuse ourselves with reading millions of 'Saveurs' and starting to do a bit of baking now in our test kitchens here in Carrot Bay. The TV series may be a few years off, but Tyler is starting to perfect macaroons and other delights.

The boys have been sailing all week and James is supporting a fabulous fat-lip from a boating accident yesterday, so will go back to school tomorrow like a returning hero.

Yesterday we had friends around for a braai and we had Peri Peri Chicken, which was gorgeously spicy after last weekends disappointment with the super-mild Jerk which we had made without the Scotch Bonnets (big mistake).  Entertaining here is fun and the company always interesting. Because we live on such a small island it's all pretty flat-earth, so we have friends who are policemen, journalists, yacht brokers, lawyers, artists, bankers, chefs, barristers and many other exotic professions (that dosn't look quite right, but you know what I mean) which one wouldn't necessarily bump into in a more suburban existence. This always makes for lively conversation and it's something we simply have not had much time to do up until now given Tyler's filthy hours that he used to work. It's wonderful being a joined-up family again. 

Today has been super lazy and we've been flopping around the house eating late breakfasts and smashing up a bit of furniture (the children) We had a big storm last night which howled around our new house, blasting us with sheets of tropical rain which was all very atmospheric but not so good for sleeping. Tyler has hauled the kids off to the park to try and burn off some excess energy before we  start the whole back-to-school routine of haircuts, homework, backpack finding and all that stuff.

Easter 2012




Sitting room, Carrot Bay


It's been wonderful having Tyler home this Easter, despite being busy with over 20 dozen hot cross buns to bake on Thursday and Saturday. Best of all, we had friends around for Easter Lunch which absolutely forced us to deal with some boxes and so by Sunday the house actually looked semi-habitable (see above). It used to be a bit like this in Joburg: Christmas drinks every year saw things like the roof being mended and hedges trimmed, so I'm always up for entertaining as a means to get some DIY accomplished. The weather on Sunday was the perfect balmy Caribbean spring day with everyone sitting on our balcony, lots of excellent wine and conversation and the house (almost) big enough to not notice the children.

William was a bit anxious that the Easter Bunny might not find us in our new house, but luckily, being a very modern child, he suggested we went on the Internet to update our address, so thank goodness then for http://www.easterbunny.com/ as all the eggs were again safely delivered. James, also being a modern child, noted that our domain address must still say South Africa, as  the eggs were from Woolworths. Arn't kids amazing these days? The wonders of an expensive education.


The rest of the weekend I'm afraid was tinged with great sadness, as our beautiful Abyssinian cat Mimi, disappeared on Thursday afternoon. We've hunted and called and have all been rather distraught.  She's been with us for almost 15 years and despite the fact that she was a queen of note and physically accosted the children when hungry, we love her dearly. Friends have been very kind to tell us of amazing stories of their cats pitching up days, weeks and even months later - so we live with a little hope. Even poor old Jasmine the parrot has been calling for her (along with an excellent imitation of the Croakie aned our spiffy new oven's timer switch).

Supersonic with a few stones

It's been almost a month since I last posted. My sister-in-law, who I love dearly but who should know better - actually sent me a message asking why I hadn't been updating my blog recently, and so here is my answer:

The Past Week:

Monday:

1. Screech around Joburg shopping for various SA essentials such as Mypradol, chefs clogs and Maldon Salt, as well as emptying the post box, visiting doctors (B12 injection) and banks and the usual endless list of things which admittedly is getting shorter every trip.
2. Fly from Johannesburg to New York (16 hours). I just knew the trip was going to go pear-shaped when I did not have the requisite screaming baby behind me, but seemingly inconsolable TWINS. Anyway I watched the absolutely brilliant "The Descendants", 5 episodes of Downton Abbey, read my Steve Jobs biography and took a Stillnox, which actually made for a reasonably good trip despite the endless screaming and sobbing that accompanied it.   

Tuesday:

1. Arrived at JFK to be told that even though I had missed my connecting flight to San Juan, it had also been cancelled in the meantime so "sorrrrrry for yoooou". After some tantrums and tears (mine this time) I managed to get on a flight 4 hours later, after working my way through most of Hudson News. I then spent another 5 hours at San Juan, as my re-scheduled flight was also cancelled/delayed/forgotten about and I finally got back to Tortola pretty late on Tuesday evening. It was lovely to see the boys again.  

Wednesday:

1. Up crack of dawn and back into the school lunchbox-hat-shoe-breakfast-library-book-nightmare-routine that is Modern Parenthood and staggered in to work. Boys had their school sports day which required 2 hours of standing in the sun watching kids scream "Go Dolphins Yeah" etc, which frankly is my worst. I know I should be more enthusiastic but I used to hate my own sports days so I'm unlikely to start loving them 30 years later, am I?
2. Collapse at home with splitting headache and a husband who wasn't feeling well. Survey the millions of boxes that constitute our life and the fact that I can find all the clothes from 20 years ago (including my matric dance dress) but nothing from the past 5. 
3. Have terrible night as Tyler gets more and  more sick.

Thursday

1. Awake to a very sick husband who cannot get out of bed and who is looking grey, sweating profusely and groaning in agony.
2. Find a 20 year old skirt, make breakfast and school lunches, push children into car and drive them 30 minutes to school. Go to work, visit husband and say goodbye to a good classmate of James's
3. Come home to find an even sicker husband who has been on the Internet and has diagnosed himself with kidney stones.
4. Make dinner, tidy Train Smash House (superficially) and collapse into bed early.

Friday

1. Attend James's play of Midsummer's Night Dream where he is Puck. This had made us late in the morning, as we had to make sugar-water spiky hair and find glitter to make him "Sprite-like'. Want to brain him as he could have bloody mentioned this a few days ago. 
2. Attend 3 hour architects meeting for our new offices. Want to brain myself after that.
3. Get back into the office and try and do some real work in the remaining few hours.
4. Slug back a Red Bull
5. Tyler digs deeper into the newly repatriated Mypradol.
6. Attend farewell party for the Bates and Williams on Cane Garden Bay. Sad.
7. Meet up with old SA friends - Grant & Lee who are here from N. Carolina to sail. Have lovely evening at Charlies. Everyone falls asleep in the car on the way home.
8. Dream of a quiet weekend, doing very little apart from selling raffle tickets at the Spring Regatta and reading. Maybe unpack the odd box or two.

Saturday

1. Awake to a deathly pale husband who says, for the very first time in our marriage, that he needs to see a doctor.
2. Try not to be selfish, but realise that my quiet weekend has probably gone for a ball of sh*t.
3. Drop off Tyler at Peebles (who confirm it is kidney stones) and do a massive Riteway shop to delude myself that we will not need to go to a supermarket until just before Easter.
4. Make lunch, push boxes around, clean kitchen, feel rather deflated and then finally get call to pick up Tyler from hospital.
5. On the way to pick him up, run out of petrol (as had forgotten to look at petrol gauge).
6. Get home and heroically have a braai. Everyone in bed by 9:30pm.

Sunday

1. Sleep in
2. Finish book
3. Make lunch
4. Go down to Nanny Cay and sell raffle tickets for Youth Development Sailing
5. Drink 1 glass of champagne
6. Come home and make supper
7. Tidy kitchen
8. Write blog.

As you can see Lisa, I think I can honestly say, without too much exaggeration that I have not had a nano-second. Plus we still don't have a new laptop yet or wireless or flipping anything really. The house is just a large space with piles of stuff everywhere for now - but that is what long Easter weekends are for. Unpacking boxes and eating chocolate.

My trip back to SA was good. The Gawith-Legh party was brilliant. I did a lot of arm-waving dancing and was rebuked for refusing to go home after 2 polite offers of lifts. My reasoning was since I had travelled the furtherest, I could stay the longest, but that's probably pushing it. I do love a good party and am hard to stop after several bottles of Graham Beck (is the real reason).

We also had a fabulous Book Club which warms my little Taurean heart, as I can almost delude myself that not much has changed and Transatlantic living is fairly seamless. But it's not and I can't and on this trip I did have to come to the hard realisation that we are all moving on, including me. Having said that, 4 trips in 16 months has been pretty luxurious but also a bit gruelling - so I am going to be pulling back now to twice a year - which I think will be more manageable on everyone - the kids, the hosts, the families and will also mean that I wont have an excuse to be the last person on the dance floor.

Tyler is now feeling a bit better (he had ultra-sound) and we are compiling our endless list of things to do for the bakery, the house, our lives, Easter and for me - work. It's all feeling a bit overwhelming but we are on a roll (or should I say Hot Cross Bun - hahahah) and it's all good. It's still beautifully cool here on the island and the boys are now on Spring Break for 2 weeks. We have Easter next weekend at home. It is wonderful to have Tyler around again (I've seen more of him in this short week than we'd had all year) and once I find my clothes I'll be really happy again.